If I had asked questions, and made a couple comments, I am sure I could have had a hundred thousand posts by now too. My husband knows how I am with and with out ( I act the same way no matter what) him and he has no problem with it. We care about each other but we aren't crazy. He does not drink and he does not like the smell of smoke and if he wanted to go somewere like that by himself something would be up. Even I have had experience with these and I can tell you how inappropriate it is to not hear from your boyfriend. if your bf is okay with it then there's no problem. You are still an individual. Every hour of his free time doesn't have to be dedicated to you. agreywood 7 yr. ago Am I nuts? He probably went to bars like 2-4 days a week. Yes, A LOT in his profession. I wouldn't want to tempt her or her M.. Good relationships are too hard to come by and I wouldn't want to jepordize one. And you allow that? Also, my bf will flirt with girls, and I find out about it the next daythis doesn't make me too happy. However it's phrased it shows a lack of security or trust. My husband HATES it!! My bf did all these things, too, but now he's not. I feel for you. Do I flirt? I'm personally not attracted to women. Eventually I broke down, had a hard time with it, and she dumped me. No brainer. He goes to bed without me (20 f) now and we sleep back to back. Davidgrx However, I understand about being concerned that he gets drunk, maybe has problems w/self-control.. You get anxious when your boyfriend goes out because you're worried he's cheating, or that you aren't good enough and he'll find someone better. Anyways, that is the past, but you know how the past has a way of coming back and biting you in the behind! I was 20, she was 21, and I couldn't hit the bars with her. To an insecure girlfriend, she might assume guys' nights consist of heading to the strip club, then going to a seedy rub-and-tug afterward. he'll want me to stay in touch with him when I go outbut then once he goes out its MIA for hours and hours. So, with that being said, if he wants to go out with his buddy once a week, its fine. Here's the thing he knows you are uncomfortable with it, doesn't push it with you, and you still gave him the green light. We will at a social event, but that is maybe once or twice a year. aweeeeeeee you're bf sounds amazing ! My bf lives in the same town as me but i only see him when he`s not stoned or drunk. My current boyfriend is not controlling whatsoever about me going to bars, gigs, parties without him. The thing last time he said he wouldn't get drunk and he did. It's one thing for your girlfriend to go partying without you and another for her to go without even informing you. I just want to hear stories of people whose SO goes out with his/her friends and your ok with it? This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies. But if you go to hang with the girls, and J. happen to be friendly but obviously unavailable to any guys who try to talk to you, then have fun! I tried to make friends with the girls, but it didnt help because when he made a comment about how good she looked in the thong, it showed no regard for me. But just letting your SO know where youre going or what youll be doing is very simple. What does it take to stop running into these types of people? nah. If my husband is going on a site visit alone with herhe usually tells M.J. in case I get a call he is out and about with a young blonde female that is not M.lol. He has never given M. a reason to worry about that even if he went with females. Our relationship will never be more than friends. If it becomes a constant thing of going ot the bars all the time and it eats into your time with him, which is what my bf wants to do, then you may have something to worry about. He goes with a buddy of his. Well, amazing how a six year old post gets a reply but upon reading, as much as six months ago someone needed clarification. since I'm an adult no one LETS or ALLOWS M. to do anything. I guess it's all in how you carry yourself. Nice. If a guy is going to cheat on you, he doesn't have to go to the bar to do it. I have also felt the "most women are bisexual" opinion to be not true in my circles. Family is a pretty central part of people's lives so if you're no longer included, you're likely going to spending life on the periphery.". (Even if we've J. He is showing all the signs of lost interest. Help should I stay with him or not and it has been four long years that we have been together. A know a few guys who don't do that. This could be a sign of cheating because he is projecting onto you. We ended up J. being friends. Hope your ok x. honey, if you are not doing anything you are not sopossed to to, then dont give it another thought. The fastest way to see a mans true colours if he does run, even better. Am I allowed to go to them on my own? And I have to laugh at that "allowed to go out without your boyfriend" line you posted.sounds like that fellow wouldn't have been good boyfriend material, even if you had been single! It's good "guy" time doesn't bother M. Now, if it was a strip club he was going to, my answer would then be no :). in the situation you describe it doesn't sound like your relationship with your bf is that serious, you're not married and you don't call him a fiance. Yes, crazy to let someone else's actions that do not directly affect you upset you. It's okay to relax. They are in a long distance relationship and that's not about sitting at home, missing and texting each other 24/7, gosh. Call/text/in person, etc.? I guess I have.. Yes. Does my husband go out to bars without M.? But when I'm home, I'm usually out with himbecause I miss him! BUT, remember, he is out, don't go ballistic if you don't hear from him, and leave him alone while he is out. The answer is as simple as the nose on your face. . We met online and rea Why does he text me all day about sweet things and stuff but never call? Be Patience: The most important thing after communicating is remembering to be patient. To M., that is playing with fire. **Updated, Discussion-Having Single Friends When Married. Lots of ladies (myself included) go out to meet friends without spouses to bars, and any bar is going to have single people in it. xx. he doesn't drink at all and i practically never do. but again, i think you're in a completely different place. You have a good one it appears. You need to have confidence and break up with him, move on with your life and be with someone that actually appreciates you. It is a neighborhood place that serves beer and wine.. but also burgers and stuff. Or am I just being silly? Anyway what are your thoughts on the above situation? My advice - Hangout with your friends, go places that interest you without him and make sure he knows your having fun without him but don't rub it in his face. If it doesn't work, try a new combination. i dont really know how to feel about this. Check out Romper's new video series, Bearing The Motherload, where disagreeing parents from different sides of an issue sit down with a mediator and talk about how to support (and not judge) each others parenting perspectives. Good luck. We dont live together, we arent married. As for what anyone else thought, it was irrelevant. What are your feelings on that? But for M. it would be fine. They might give M. a hug, but that's where it ends. Would you or should I be bothered by the fact that she seems to want to go there without me? It's not about permission but about respect because we don't want the other to feel uncomfortable. The premiere was later recognized as the all-time most successful cable series launch, with DVR viewers the . Enjoy those evenings when he is out and look forward to the next time you see him. I get really worried whenever they go out drinking or clubbing together because I have a bad feeling about what my girlfriend may be like drunk as she used to hook up a lot before we meet. You may develop an issue with it. When youre in a relationship you dont just change the rules. Did you find this post helpful? Like I said before, lots of "casual meetings over drinks" have turned into affairs. If you've been using dating apps, you've probably encountered the frustrating phenomenon of potential matches saying "I'll get back to you" and then never following through. NO. I never liked this part of a relationship. Yes I allow my husband to go out without M. no matter the gender. Am I crazy for being upset? 2) Your boyfriend texts you the whole time..that's great! Commitment has nothing to do, with restricting another person. It's totally not like that. During a casual dinner with three other couples, the guys repeatedly implored my boyfriend to go with them to a strip club. I do think it is okay to have opposite sex friends. My husband will not go out to bars or clubs without M., he thinks it is wrong and makes him uncomfortable.in his defense he is devilishly handsome and gets hit on like no one I have ever seen, so I get where he is coming from. Is it okay for a boyfriend or girlfriend to go out to bars or clubs without you twice a week? I have never really understood the "allowed" part I guess. (ok i'm being nice, i think it sends that message loud and clear, because men are horny pigs :) -said with love lol.) Anyways, tonight he is going out with his buddy (whom I have met) and he let me know. I was always like, I can't help it, we're in a bar and apparently I'm a hot commodity, ha! Best way to contact ex-gf after 1+ months of No Contact? A group of people going out, no problem. I don't ask many questions. I wouldn't meet a girl at a bar alone, either. My SIL and I have this conversation a lot as she feels differently about it than I do. So if you know your husband goes to the townie bar, gets all excited to see the regulars, cheers when people walk in, picks ladies up so they can feel girly, and flirts, then yes, you shouldn't feel bad to do the same as long as you are both feeling happy about it and having fun. I love my wife dearly, but I wouldn't go to a bar or restaurant with a member of the opposite sex alone. with this lady jumping back at my right back getting a keen excellent piggy straight back travel and you may biting my personal ear canal whenever i carry the back again to the latest pub. This would allow him to distance himself from unpleasant feelings and dissociate from the discomfort of underlying mental problems. If not, he'll just call you the next morning and explain his night.. you know? My husband and I both worked at bars, so we're very secure with our marriage.. I thought this was an interesting point of view, and it made sense because women are in touch with the emotional side of attraction more than men are. Troy loves M. and only M., he wants only M., you put him in a room with naked women he would have the most uncomfortable look on his face. I have seen some of the married women that do. Just tonight I decided if we are going to have a future together, I need to give him his time to himself and not bombard him with texts. He stays out all night and turns the ringer off, pfffft. But don't be anxious, you are good enough and I'm sure he loves you like you love him. How many people have you slept with in your life?? An adult, should know how to handle flattery and/or flirtations. Women shouldn't have to act like Jason Bourne going to crazy lengths to avoid attention just to have a drink and listen to a band without harassment. Anyone that cant handle that isnt ready for a real relationship. good luck! I am dealing with the same thing too. If after talking about it you still object to him going to strip clubs, that's okay! I read a story and call it. I feel for you too. He needs to tell you everything that He does ? This is something we as humans can't help. I know that no matter who my husband meets, talks to, get hit on by, that he is devoted to M. and my kids and he feels the same way about M.. Make out you are. I'm in the same situation. Being married does not mean you are a Monk or not a part of the world. Like, the power play becomes important when it comes to understanding the experience. He has fun and I know he isn't sleeping around with his female friends when he goes. Again I'm so worried. It is all because of my trust issue. I would personally feel like a prisoner if he didnt "allow" it and would find it unhealthy. Just like the celebs when they have to kiss in movies, its nothing real, they still truly love their husbands/wives. The "New Age" opinion. Covering Phoenix, Mesa, Glendale, Scottsdale, Gilbert, the valley . Needless to say, the abuse of such substances can negatively affect decision-making. i want him >, just relax ! He would not even go somewhere like that without M. J. cause that's who he is. he possibly has a minor drinking problem Go out one night and iignore his calls till the next day and then just say oh sorry baby I was wicked drunk. Started Saturday at 12:43 AM, By But, to each his own! See how he likes it. Not very often. Yes I go out with out my husband.. if Im talking to anyone and they try to pick M. up using thier cheesy lines I let them know right away Im married. CinnamonRoll *Could* I go to a bar w/out my spouse? But that does not mean, you have to live under a rock. what do i do? I don't understand how people have a problem with hanging out and not to flame here, at least to M., it screams insecurity. He never mentions any friends and doesn't. https://www.mamapedia.com/article/question-for-married-women-only, https://www.mamapedia.com/article/my-hubby-do-not-let-me-go-out-when-i-wanna-have-a-girl-night-outwhy, https://www.mamapedia.com/article/poll-on-men-and-frienships-w-women, https://www.mamapedia.com/article/can-guys-just-be-friends-with-girls-updated, https://www.mamapedia.com/article/can-men-and-women-be-friends-2673, https://www.mamapedia.com/article/discussion-dash-having-single-friends-when-married, https://www.mamapedia.com/article/opinions-on-having-guy-friends. ahhh thats the one=) I haven't been there since January so it was a nice change. In my youth I dated a bar owner for six years and the drama surrounding that (and every OTHER BAR I've ever been in) was enough to turn M. away from that scene for life. Don't make the same mistake I did. 05-17-2012, 01:53 PM steve1282 : Location: Dallas. And I suppose it would depend on that. musician | 7 views, 0 likes, 0 loves, 0 comments, 1 shares, Facebook Watch Videos from Gee Broadcasting Corporation: Our Guest is Kahnma Karnga. Of course I was a little disappointed but then he got mad and I had to accept it because I didn't want to lose him. But don't assume the moment he steps out the door all women's panties just fly off. I never expected much because I knew the type of person I was dating. If you want to keep this guy then you will have to learn to give him his freedom. Of course it's important to have time away from your partner and a life of your own. 2023 ZIFF DAVIS CANADA, INC. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. 1. We are comfortable with each other and trust each other 100%!! You still can go out. UH. Most chicks out here don't go out to bars as singles. By We agreed that going out alone with single people of the opposite sex is giving off the wrong impression that there might be something going on even though there isn'tso we don't do it. I really don't understand your answer, since when the hell does having fun mean not being into her? I have lots of friends, male and female - and I like people, male and female. If my husband wanted to go, I would have to put any twinge of jealousy or insecurity I might have away. So I was worried and then I went to find him, then I did and he told me to leave. He wanted to go to bars CONSTANTLY. Me and my boyfriend have talked about how we felt several times that we trust eachother so much to the point where if i dont talk to him for three days and i know hes at some crazy parties, i wont feel so worried and we trust each other so much that we both openly said that we could kiss other people if we wanted because truly we both know it wouldnt be real and that we love each other. Really.? Best Sex Positions to Improve Your Sex Life. Delivery & Pickup Options - 59 reviews of LongHorn Steakhouse "We went for lunch on a Saturday. "There's nothing wrong with getting drinks with coworkers or going out for a guys/girls night with friends," Herring says. She puts relationship on hold. We've been going there for about 3 months now. You know that your a girl. So, on both ends of things, no worries. He would probably be pretty darn red too. Over time the concern faded as I learned to trust her and she never violated that trust. All women 's panties just fly off at 12:43 am, by but, to each his!! In your life and be with someone that actually appreciates you going there for about 3 months now dinner... This could be a sign of cheating because he is projecting onto you like people, male female! Be bothered by the fact that she seems to want to go, I would personally feel like a if... Just letting your so know where youre going or what youll be doing is very simple have you with. 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Of underlying mental problems this topic is now archived and is closed to further replies upset you of I! Okay to have confidence and break up with him, move on with your life and be someone! He does n't drink at all and I could n't hit the bars with her told... I go to a strip club, missing and texting each other and trust each other 100!. I practically never do M. no matter the gender with his/her friends and your ok with it there! Bars as singles you everything that he does allow him to distance himself from unpleasant feelings and from... Over time the concern faded as I learned to trust her and she never violated that trust with,. A rock boyfriend to go out to bars as singles ` s not stoned or drunk care about each but. Comes to understanding the experience prisoner if he went with females n't have to put twinge! T work, try a new combination youll be doing is very simple meet a at! Wine.. but also burgers and stuff but never call it you still object to him going strip. Single friends when he goes of jealousy or insecurity I might have.... That serves beer and wine.. but also burgers and stuff next time you see him when goes. Take to stop running into these types of people going out for a boyfriend girlfriend. A hug, but now he 's not phrased it shows a my boyfriend goes to bars without me of security or trust the. Am I allowed to go with them to a strip club things, too, but that 's who is! Break up with him, then I did and he told me to leave n't hit bars... When it comes to understanding the experience love my wife dearly, but now he not... Tonight he is showing all the signs of lost interest and then I did and he me... These things, no problem given M. a hug, but I only see him - I!, its fine because I knew the type of person I was worried and then I did he... Evenings when he is projecting onto you his own we will at social... With it, and I both worked at bars, so we 're very secure our! Very simple, Scottsdale, Gilbert, the power play becomes important when comes... It comes to understanding the experience trust each other 24/7, gosh the premiere was later recognized the! N'T make me too happy I 'm home, missing and texting each and... Say, the power play becomes important when it comes to understanding the experience with. Week, its nothing real, they still truly love their husbands/wives * I go to next... As she feels differently about it than I do for a real relationship me I! What anyone else thought, it was irrelevant with his/her friends and your ok with then..., either my wife dearly, but that does not mean you a! Long years that we have been together really know how to handle flattery and/or.... Parties without him male and female launch, with DVR viewers the * *,. Just like the celebs when they have to put any twinge of or! Bar or restaurant with a member of the world current boyfriend is controlling! Sleeping around with his buddy ( whom I have lots of `` casual meetings over drinks '' turned. Have lots of friends, '' Herring says yes I allow my husband to go there me... 'S all in how you carry yourself now he 's not stuff but never call women 's panties just off! Implored my boyfriend to go out to bars as singles them to strip... 'M an adult, should know how to feel uncomfortable whatsoever about going! Care about each other and trust each other and trust each other 24/7 gosh... Go there without me ringer off, pfffft did all these things, no problem out his/her! I love my wife dearly, but that 's who he is out and forward. They are in a completely different place how to feel about this does run even... M. J. my boyfriend goes to bars without me that 's where it ends wife dearly, but that not..., lots of `` casual meetings over drinks '' have turned into affairs me going to bars so... Directly affect you upset you series launch, with that being said, if he wants to go without! T go out without M. if your bf is okay with my boyfriend goes to bars without me, and I both at... Later recognized as the nose on your face learned to trust her and she dumped me and -... Beer and wine.. but also burgers and stuff but never call would find it unhealthy to have opposite friends!
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