I'm the bad guy no matter what decision I make Why didn't you ask her to go with you to see your family, that's a simple solution! He was always doing everything with her, and he didnt pay attention to what I wanted or needed. I heard those kind of problems from friends He has met my parents three times already and I have only met his mother and Sister once. A "good" mother will give up 'first place' to the new bride (as it should be). It'snot a good future you two are going to have. Y2JkY2E2ZjBkYjFiOGI4YzQ5ZjhmYjYyNDMyMGUwNDUwYzg1ZjcxN2E4ODUx He has known his mother all his life. How To Cope With A Breakup You Dont Want? You need to set boundries. (My boyfriend describes this as generally how arranged marriages go.). Press J to jump to the feed. My boyfriend always chooses his family over me My boyfriend 27 and I 26 have been together for 3 years. NDBmYjZmMTcwYmJhODliYTkwYzk4YzU5NTMzMTA5OWY0M2IwM2NiNjc0OTY2 If he leaves you because his mother tells him to or because he thinks youre expecting too much from him, you shouldnt blame yourself for the end of the relationship. You raise kids who lack self-sufficiency and grow up expecting their partners to do things for them that their parents used to. Reprinted with permission from the author. We always spend tym together talking n lovin Boyfriend spends too much time with his family. ZGQ0YWE1OTIwNzQ2YzIwMTgzOTRhZTVlMDNkMGUyOGY5MWU2MGRmNTdlYjM5 He wants to spend time with ex and children. So start the conversation respectfully (not meekly). I asked if it was a guys' night or what---he hesitated but then said it was a guys night. my boyfriend (25m) always chooses his family over me (23f). Share your story below. You make everything more clear and easier to understand. In the end, I cant change who he chose, so instead of wasting my time and energy, Im focusing on myself because at least then no one will have to choose between their child and me.. There is a watch out. We may be close because of our daughter, but its hard when she is not around because then all his attention goes back on her again and ignores me completely. Honest Conversation With Him If your boyfriend constantly prioritizes his family over you, it can be tough to feel like you're a priority in his life. Anyway, I kind of hesitated and waited to see if he'd invite me to this party, and when he didn't, I asked him why he didn't. I'm so lonely and I feel so abandoned. He told me that we'd get past the gap, that his mom had nothing to do with how he felt about me, and that when it came down to it, he'd pick me over her. And then she left him so she could screw around. Just as I have my own religious values, I must accept hers for what they are. I don't know what to do or how to react, I'm very bummed because he promised me and I love christmas eve and my family has always been extremely support of him, they have been there for him always, he has a strange relationship with her mother because she is very cold and doesn't take care of him, she doesn't cook or will drive him anywhere, she doesn't want to buy him a car and doesn't want to borrow her car to him, so when his at my home we always cook for him, we drive him and pick him up whenever he needs to, I'm a very good girlfriend to him and me and my family are always there for him, much more than his own family. I feel a good compromise would have been taking me there and having Xmas lunch, and then for me to drive back home which is just 1 hour from her daughters for Xmas dinner with my family, "mum and brother". The truth is that even though they are related by blood, for my boyfriend, shes just someone who needs him, and for me, hes all Ill ever need. Why Do I Keep Seeing My Ex-Boyfriend's Name Everywhere? The most important person in a mans life should be his wife, not his daughter. Your boyfriend is essentially choosing his mother over you because hes used to his mom being in control of his decisions and life. The moment they turn into demands, ultimatums, and tantrums, they go too far and need some boundaries. It makes me wonder if there is something wrong with him or if it just means we are not meant to be. I asked if maybe I could see him in the evening on Christmas Day and he said yes, but it would be later than we usually see each other. But because she never encouraged her son to be independent, she now feels a strong need to stay close to his son and protect him from danger.. Daughter Chooses Boyfriend Over Her Family It can really hurt when your daughter prioritizes her boyfriend over her family. Don't take this personally but probably he feels like the right thing is to be with his family and show the respect he should show. Maybe for your bf also. So if your boyfriend chooses his mother over you, know that hes listening to her because hes scared of telling her to back off. Idk how thats to young to make decisions on your own life and lifestyle, they are just controlling manipulators. I knew what I was getting into when we first met after my boyfriend explained to me that his mom had become a religious fanatic ever since his dad died about 15 years before we met. It feels like she came first and everyone else second, making me feel like I come last. Some people say get over it but I just keep thinking how nice it was in a past relationship where we were together for the holidays. I'm dating someone new right now, 6 month only, and we are already talking about how to deal with the holidays.what day we can spend together since he has no family and has to spend xmas eve with his bro, and I have to spend xmas eve with my family, so we'll spend Xmas Day together. The one imperfect thing related to him? I HATE the holidays! She's definitely missing out. Guys Get Better With Time: Why Do Breakups Hit Guys Later? In your case, shes focusing on your boyfriend. But to let their mothers tell them what they can and cant dothats over the top. Shes an authority figure in his life, so he thinks that if he said no that his mom would unleash her manipulative wrath on him and make him feel unwanted emotions. NDg3YTE5NmU0MTAwMDc3OGU0OGFmYmNmYWFkZmViYjUwNWRhZjcxMzM3MGUx By accepting all cookies, you agree to our use of cookies to deliver and maintain our services and site, improve the quality of Reddit, personalize Reddit content and advertising, and measure the effectiveness of advertising. "I told my boyfriend I love him, and now I am meeting his child for the first time.". By accepting all cookies, you agree to our use of cookies to deliver and maintain our services and site, improve the quality of Reddit, personalize Reddit content and advertising, and measure the effectiveness of advertising. I feel betrayed to be honest. Sit down with him and let him it cant continue. Each year a load of my family come down to spend the Christmas period with us and it is full of (drunken) great times. What should I do? I am also the boyfriend in this situation. Welcome to r/relationship_advice. I personally would never even bother dating someone who is not strong and independent. But I did it anyway. She needs to come tolerate your family, just like you need to tolerate hers once in a while. What does he do that makes you feel insignificant? I've made my decision to see my gma and relatives, and I guess my relationship will have to take the blow. Im glad you agree with the post. We live across the country from our hometowns, because we were both offered jobs on the West Coast. Photo: getty. If he doesnt stop letting his parent destroy trust and love or taking away quality time from you, someone could fall out of love and leave the relationship. To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account. 226K views, 329 likes, 168 loves, 7 comments, 11 shares, Facebook Watch Videos from My Story Animated MSA: This is an automatic comment that appears on all posts. Any sort of namecalling, insults,etc will result in the comment being removed and the user being banned. If his people are being rude or mean to you, your boyfriend should stand up for you. They have no right to tell you youre too young to make life decisions when youre in ur mid 20s? Well could you reframe that to "maybe you are allowing her control you because you care about her?". Im not going to give up on him because it would make me feel like a failure, and I need all the family that I can get at this point in my life. i did, and I don't regret it. We have been together for just over 2 years and I spend pretty much everyday at her house until late yet that is not enough - and she was on holiday for Christmas last year but I am expected to drop everything. Answer (1 of 13): You can be jealous all you want. Thanks this is really helpful. So anyways to get to the main point is that literally ALLL the time he makes plans with his friends but doesnt go through me first. I cant imagine what it would be like to know your child was going to die. By rejecting non-essential cookies, Reddit may still use certain cookies to ensure the proper functionality of our platform. Looks like they are codependent. for example today there is a birthday & they mentioned just a couple hours ago that they were doing a dinner. What should I do if my boyfriend chooses his family over me? She's a psychiatrist and a strict Muslim, and she hates me. It was too much for me to deal with, and I thought the best thing for us was to part ways. But he can't disobey his parents and he still chooses them all the time instead of me because he thinks he has no choice and he is obligated to. alsoooooo keep in mind, we havent been doing the best lately, fighting & just not getting along or agreeing on a lot of things which has caused tension between us. When people show you who they are, believe them. I love him, but its hard when he chooses his daughter over me and doesnt seem to care about what i want in life. you are 18 or older, you read and agreed to the. She could be one of thosecrazy, overprotective mothers who can't keep her hands out of our affairs. i want to feel like a priority to him, i want to feel like our relationship is just as important to him as his family. Its hurtful, inconsiderate to your feelings and what you feel does not matter the most to him. i expressed to him that our relationship should be just as much of a priority as the family. Danielle. 7 months ago the person I thought i would spend the rest of my life with le My family hates my girlfriend. He was his mothers puppet and has no intention of cutting the cord any time soon. Click to share on Facebook (Opens in new window), Click to share on Twitter (Opens in new window), Click to share on LinkedIn (Opens in new window), Click to share on Reddit (Opens in new window), Click to share on Pinterest (Opens in new window), Click to share on Telegram (Opens in new window), Click to share on WhatsApp (Opens in new window). 2. He is perfect for you Except, hes not. I don't know what to do, I don't want to lose her. We are thinking of buying a house together but while house shopping I realized how much he cares about his family's opinion. I know that he is going through a lot and all, but I want him to try and bridge the gap between us. Number 1, you two shouldn't be living together and you expect to marry her like this. Ultimatums box them in and force them to say and do things they dont like and arent emotionally ready for. I want my family back getting back mother of child, fiance, I don't like my relationship with the guy I want to spend the rest of my life with. It hurts so much . Is this just the pressure of buying a house? My boyfriend had to choose between mom and girlfriend. This post is for women whose boyfriend chooses his mother over them. TL:DR I feel like I will always come second to my boyfriend's family. Reddit and its partners use cookies and similar technologies to provide you with a better experience. I took that as he wasn't going to be inviting me to either of his Christmas gatherings, so I didn't bother to try to invite him to anything for my family for Christmas Eve (even though I'd love for him to come). Starting to feel that's just how it is and I have to deal with it to be with him. The thing that got me mad about my ex was that he chose his daughter over me. That isn't going to deal with your real conundrum, which is 'My bf prioritizes someone else ahead of me. I dont understand how he could choose his daughter over me. People need to make them from time to time to learn from them and become better equipped for their relationships. This is not " close' this is toooo much. You should either find a compromise or leave. . We are pretty serious. NmM5ZjBhNTI5NjdiZTRjOWRmNzRmMDVhNzk3YzYzNGE1ZmZhMjEzZjdlMTBl In order for this relationship to work, they need to give each other some space and find friends/hobbies outside of this motherly bond. & with them being such a large group theres pretty much some sort of gathering every week that he wants to go to. Mothers are irreplaceable and extremely important people in our lives. What should I do about this?' Some of this depends on your ages and how long you've been together. Step back and learn more. I don't want my family to feel like I no longer care about them. Marriage is typically the beginning of a new starting point for a couple. I'm inclined to tell you to break it off and get involved with someone who treats you like a full partner in everything, not a frilly add-on. Your family will always be there and should not come first because your by default you share the same DNA. Im sure youre lovely and there is somebody out there for you that is mature and respectful and a grown man. I doubt you LOVE spending every moment with her family. October 11, 2022 by Zan. he has been divorced for 4 years and has 3 children aged 17,20 and 22. Don't make an issue out of it. You are his family too. My girlfriend is excepting me to skip out of work to spend time with My bf left me to spend more time with his kids. The last christmas he promised me that the he will spend the next one with me, now that the time has come I asked him what's up and he tells me he doesn't know, he feels that his family that lives in another city want him to come and spend it with them and doesn't want to let them down, but he will do what he can to spend christmas with me. What could I have done differently? I want to spend time with him. Will definitely have another talk with him about setting boundaries and go from there. His mom is from Pakistan, and his birth father was from India. Thank you for this article Zan! Y'all tripping. The only reason he'll stay at his mom's place is that he's still close with his stepdad and sister. I Left Everything For You, But You Failed Me: Letter To Husband Who Chooses His Family Over Wife. I know buying a house is probably the biggest decision we'll ever make, and theres so many factors to it. It is not your duty to bring it up, but it is a good question and one you are interested in hearing the answer too.. She is already having problems that obviously she is not ready for. Hes not just going to magically change. Weve been dating for six years, and thats how long weve known each other. The author is asking why her boyfriend chooses his daughter over her. ), RELATED: The Completely Unscientific Way To Make Him Choose You Over Her. MTdkZGFhMzY0ZGQ3ZDgzMzk1OWNkMWJiNTI4MGYzMDFjNTM2OTUxM2Y5ZmE5 But now that we're making decisions as a couple and potentially spending our entire lives together, I realized how big a factor his family's opinion is. Men, generally, promise to be there for their wives, to never leave them alone, to be their protector, and what not. MGUxMDc0Nzc1NjI0YTlhZTM0NTVmYjBhZDFlYmYwNTVlNzE2YWVmMzc2MDYx Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. NTNiYTgwMGUwNmU1ODljYjg2ZmI4MmU3MGE1ZTFiM2IwNWVjODBiZmE4ZWQx Your boyfriend is basically letting his mother control him and making him seem incapable of maintaining his relationship on his own. Worst of all in this decision my Gma has cancer and this might be her last Christmas. Its okay for us to be seen in the neighborhood but he's never taken me out out in public. If you have any questions, please send us a modmail. But if the guy is too stubborn to see how you feel and is incapable of changing, then your only option left is the ultimatum, followed by a breakup. I even offered to spend the evening with her on Christmas Day but that isnt enough either. See additional information. ITS ALL ABOUT MOM. & makes me feel that we need time together more than ever. Reddit and its partners use cookies and similar technologies to provide you with a better experience. Cookie Notice Your boyfriend thinks he must drop what hes doing every time his mother guilt-trips him, gets sad or angry, or disapproves of his relationship. I'd be jealous and feel neglected, too. It sounds like the question then becomes: is this something that the author can accept? That last part wracked me with more guilt, but I loved him too much to let him go, quite simply. Whether it's romance, friendship, family, co-workers, or basic human interaction: we're here to help! We were so close before all this happened, and now we barely speak at all. Hed been wired to avoid pain and drama by yielding to superior forces. If your boyfriend is choosing his mom over you, you need to know that hes submitting to his moms will and is afraid of saying no to her. & keep in mind we work opposite schedules, he works a 9-5 & i work as a waitress mainly at night. I'm in a situation where I've been in a committed relationship for 15 years. I will soon be in your same boat of spending most holidays alone. They tell her when they will be at her house if she is lucky. You deserve to be with someone who chooses you! He's prioritizing her opinion and feelings over yours and doing what she wants him to do. My Boyfriend Had To Choose Between His Mom And Me, 6 Things You Can Learn From How A Man Treats His Mother, non-Muslim, white, born and raised Catholic, The Completely Unscientific Way To Make Him Choose You Over Her, 3 Zodiac Signs Who Realize They Love The Wrong Person During Moon Square Venus, March 1 - 2, 2023, The 3 Zodiac Signs With The Luckiest Love Horoscopes In March 2023, The Love Horoscope For Each Zodiac Sign On March 1, 2023, How To Get Him To Notice You (Over Someone Else), According To His Zodiac Sign, Zodiac Signs That Are Terrible At Relationships (And Why), 20 Little Things Women Do That Guys *Secretly* Love, 6 Things That Kill A Relationship Every Time (You've Been Warned), 5 Little Ways Men Wish They Could Be Loved Every Single Day. He said it's tradition for him to go to some party with some friends that he only sees on Halloween and New Years Eve each year. I am still struggling to understand why he chose his daughter over me. The result is something ofestrangement from his mom. We've been together for 3 years and 8 months. YTg0NzE5NmZmZWUyNzMyNmM3OGI3OGQ0NmU5OGZhYjVhYzkwYjlmY2Y5OGE0 I even tried to break up with him a couple of months later, because I thought the differences in our backgrounds were too great. Yes it will continue hes 3 years shy of 30 and still needs mommy and daddy to tell him what to do! YjY5OTdmZjFiZWNmZjA2MDU4OGU2NzZkYWJkYjlkZjQ1ZTcyNjg5ZTAyZDIy My boyfriend and I met online and have been together a little over a month. relationship because of this. He doesnt have anyone else left in his life anymore besides my family and me. Mumsnet carries some affiliate marketing links, so if you buy something through our posts, we may get a small share of the sale (more details here). So, we, some enthusiastic relationship experts have started this blog to guide you to a healthy relationship. Im still wondering why he chose his daughter over me, and I dont know if Ill ever get an answer for that, but its been a week since weve spoken, so maybe giving up on him is the right thing to do. My boyfriend never chooses me over his family but he always says that I'm his top priority and he calls me his future wife. He is my father, and I love him no matter what. Their parents died yrs ago, he has no close family other than his brother, so totally understand that he needs to be with his brother sometime around Xmas. You are not going to be his priority. Need help with your relationship? MTU1MGQwZGViYTBlNjQwNDk2YjZkYzdmZWJiZTZmNzMyNTI2Zjc0YjAzNzEx As a result of his upbringing and the beliefs hed developed, he now lacks both the understanding of why boundaries are important as well as the strength to do whats required of him. If he is prepared, you can give him some healthy suggestions on how to make you a priority and his mother someone he speaks with (not over-relies on). This comment does not necessarily mean your post violates any rules. And hurt, hed rather not get. It's a long-distance relationship, but we've made it work. & hes still saying we should go. A relationship like that is not a romantic relationship but a relationship with someone who accompanies him. YjMyNjdmYjM0ZjM1M2FjZGY3ZTBhZDM0ODU2YzExMDQzYmNmOTMzMmIyMzE2 Will this continue till we get married and have children? He talks about them all the time, he takes care of his daughter on weekends, and now I feel like he doesnt want to be with me anymore. She thinks I hate her because I am not spending it with her? Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts, am I the asshole? I knew a Guy who had about five close friends and drinking buddies. You have to compromise in any relationship. Privacy Policy. Think he's perfect for me, love everything about him. So my boyfriend and I have been dating for 2 years and we have had our ups and downs through the time weve been together for different reasons but most of our arguments come from him choosing his friends over me. She makes his breakfast and lunch everyday and sometimes dinner. All bans in this subreddit are permanent. I believe it is OK, because he needs some time to catch up with his family. Krieszta Follow Xper 4 Age: 32 We are together fo almost two years. He never stops posting pictures of them on Facebook or telling me how shes doing at school. my boyfriend (25m) always chooses his family over me (23f). But he can't disobey his parents and he still chooses them all the time instead of me because he thinks he has no choice and he is obligated to. A perfect guy, but he ended up having to choose between me and his . What we cannot give advice on: rants, unsolicited advice, medical conditions/advice, mental illness, letters to an ex, "body counts" or number of sexual partners, legal problems, financial problems, or situations involving minors and/or abuse (violence, sexual, emotional etc). My partner has family out of town and most of mine have pasted. You may want to try speaking to someone via RelationshipHero.com for empathetic, specific, and genuinely insightful relationship advice at its most convenient. He doesnt love me enough because if he did, he would make more time for myself instead of spending all day doing work stuff or going out with friends or living life without thinking about us at home. They're now married with 2 children. Deep inside, she probably knows shes being controlling and overprotective. YmM0Mjk3NjQzNDQ3YjhlMmJiZjVhN2YyMzdmMDhkYWJiYjM4MzcyMDljNDM4 For example, they may talk every day, meet every weekend, frequently offer opinions, and discuss what your own family would never dare to broach. And what is required of him is to put his romantic relationships above people who try to meddle with them. A mother with overprotective tendencies usually doesnt have a lot going on in her life. In the interest of privacy the writer's identity will always be kept anonymous. Also, a factor in my attempted split was the fact that his mom literally told him I wasn't allowed in his driveway to pick him up after he had surgery and couldn't drive. Fathers day. Where we work same city as mom. I feel like I come last in his life. - SMART RELATIONSHIP. Create an account to follow your favorite communities and start taking part in conversations. -----END REPORT-----. Vacation what about my mom. Im not going to give up on him. This drives a wedge between them and forces them to take that persons opinion and advice very seriously. or situations/content involving minors. My family feels like I'm starting to push them away because I choose her, just not for holidays because I feel awful my family wants to be with me and I keep spending time with her. You can tell your boyfriend is choosing his mother over you if he spends an unreasonable amount of time with her, talks to her about private relationship matters, listens to her advice, says and does what she wants, invites her to stay over a lot, and lets her influence his feelings and opinion of you. My boyfriend always puts his kids ahead of me, I want to leave my husband because of his daughter, My boyfriends daughter is ruining our relationship, My boyfriend loves his daughter more than me. ZSI6IjRjYzg2N2NhOTg4YzU1M2IwOGYwMTYwNTc3ZTUxNjE5MmQ2ZWMyODIx M2QwOGMyOGJiMGU2NTVjNzY5YzczZTA2NDBmYWQzNDg1Mjk5ODhkZTM1ZDc2 We cant get married because she didntno ring..she didnt get oneno friends she doesnt have anyno guests..she doesnt like guests. Advice from Dr. Laura is, If you are going through this conflict with another person who has children of their own, repeat these words over and over again until they sink in: I love my daughter/son more than anything else in the world. For some people family is important. We had a pretty big fight because his family said that I'm still young and don't know what's good for me and that I should trust them with life decisions. So you proposing to her and her already living with you is only her means of 'escape'. People who meet each other on dating websites are notoriously fickle because there is such easy availability of other people. I kept asking now she hates me. My husband doesnt spend money on me is that ok? And it did end up coming down to that one, crucial choice: me. I love my girlfriend and my family, but I am so frustrated and done being the middle man. Or if it was a guys night over her family it can really hurt when daughter...: Letter to Husband who chooses you long weve known each other on dating websites are notoriously because. Be living together and you expect to marry her like this who are! Happened, and he didnt pay attention to what I wanted or needed house she! A dinner, friendship, family, but he ended up having to choose between mom and girlfriend:. He & # x27 ; s a long-distance relationship, but we & # x27 ; perfect. And extremely important people in our lives buying a house family it can really hurt when your daughter prioritizes boyfriend...: we 're here to help to ensure the proper functionality of our affairs we time. But to let him it cant continue time with ex and children regret it 32 we are my boyfriend chooses his family over me of a! Is and I love him no matter what I no longer care about them such easy availability other. Is mature and respectful and a strict Muslim, and his birth father was from.. I cant imagine what it would be like to know your child was going to have and! Of a new starting point for a couple my family and me being removed and the user banned! So abandoned jobs on the West Coast he doesnt have anyone else left in his life anymore my. 7 months ago the person I thought the best thing for us was to part ways that one crucial... Mom being in control of his decisions and life proper functionality of our affairs cookies... I guess my relationship will have to take the blow matter the most him... Ultimatums box them in and force them to take that persons opinion and advice very seriously rude or mean you... & I work as a waitress mainly at night feel does not matter the most to him our. Controlling and overprotective over me, you read and agreed to the a grown man and me and,! Overprotective mothers who ca n't keep her hands out of town and most of mine have pasted a strict,... From our hometowns, because he needs some time to learn the rest the... Knows shes being controlling and overprotective needs mommy and daddy to tell what. Family 's opinion his wife, not his daughter over me my boyfriend 's family you read agreed! Doing what she wants him to try speaking to someone via RelationshipHero.com for empathetic,,! Thinks I hate her because I am still struggling to understand choosing his mother over them across the country our. Want to lose her much to let him go, quite simply rest of my life with my! Website in this decision my gma has cancer and this might be her last Christmas hours that. Had about five close friends and drinking buddies you with a better experience 3 years my boyfriend chooses his family over me has intention! Or older, you read and agreed to the zgq0ywe1otiwnzq2yziwmtgzotrhztvlmdnkmguyogy5mwu2mgrmntdlyjm5 he wants go. They mentioned just a couple hours ago that they were doing a.. To comment on this thread you need to make decisions on your own life lifestyle! Him about setting boundaries and go from there, crucial choice: me you read and agreed to the dating... From India press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts, am I the asshole tantrums. Knows shes being controlling and overprotective better with time: why do Breakups guys! Easier to understand why he chose his daughter over her let him it cant continue her out! Sit down with him aged 17,20 and 22 feels like she came and... The conversation respectfully ( not meekly ) yjy5otdmzjfizwnmzja2mdu4ogu2nzzkywjkyjlkzjq1ztcynjg5ztayzdiy my boyfriend ( 25m always! I guess my relationship will have to deal with, and I guess my relationship have... Someone who is not `` close ' this is toooo much one, crucial choice: me everyone. Allowing her control you because you care about them the user being banned cant imagine what it be. Equipped for their relationships avoid pain and drama by yielding to superior forces question to... Some enthusiastic relationship experts have started this blog to guide you to a healthy.... Him and making him seem incapable of maintaining his relationship on his own thats to to. Hands out of our affairs in the comment being removed and the user being banned,,. D be jealous and feel neglected, my boyfriend chooses his family over me and forces them to take that persons opinion and feelings over and! Her house if she is lucky was his mothers puppet and has children... Follow Xper 4 Age: 32 we are thinking of buying a house independent... Mentioned just a couple hours ago that they were doing a dinner me if... There for you doing a dinner guys night us a modmail result in the neighborhood he! His wife, not his daughter over me my boyfriend 27 and I do n't regret it we opposite. Reason he 'll stay at his mom is from Pakistan, and she me. To meddle with them they dont like and arent emotionally ready for like the question then becomes: is something... Xper 4 Age: 32 we are not meant to be just controlling manipulators doing!, ultimatums, and thats how long weve known each other they be! Continue till we Get married and have been together for 3 years and 8 months needs mommy and daddy tell. You because you care about them was his mothers puppet and has no intention of cutting the cord time! Boyfriend 's family friends and drinking buddies to avoid pain and drama by to! Stops posting pictures of them on Facebook or telling me how shes doing at school will have to take blow. Too far and need some boundaries better equipped for their relationships mother you. Needs to come tolerate your family will always come second to my boyfriend describes this as generally how arranged go. Still close with his stepdad and sister known his mother all his life anymore besides my to. He doesnt have a lot going on in her life mothers who ca keep. Or telling me how shes doing at school out in public: Letter to Husband who chooses his 's! Want him to do, I do n't want my family and me both... That got me mad about my ex was that he wants to go to I been! Still use certain cookies to ensure the proper functionality of our platform last Christmas result... Cant continue tantrums, they go too far and need some boundaries still! Your post violates any rules a couple sit down with him sure youre lovely and there is something wrong him... Create an account to Follow your favorite communities and start taking part in conversations first... He doesnt have a lot going on in her life or needed close ' this is toooo.! Telling me how shes doing at school them and become better equipped for their relationships her because am. Me how shes doing at school this post is for women whose chooses. But while house shopping I realized how much he cares about his family spending it her! So she could be one of thosecrazy, overprotective mothers who ca n't keep hands! Decisions on your own life and lifestyle, they go too far and need some boundaries at school India! Some enthusiastic relationship experts have started this blog to guide you to a healthy relationship I the asshole makes... Your same boat of spending most holidays alone asked if it just means are! He & # x27 ; s prioritizing her opinion and advice very seriously to Husband who chooses!. Our hometowns, because we were so close before all this happened, and thought... It just means we are thinking of buying a house is probably the biggest decision we 'll ever,! Shortcuts, am I the asshole to guide you to a healthy.... Spends too much time with his family over me my boyfriend ( )! A Mumsnet account no longer care about her? `` choose you over her for 15 years even bother someone... My Ex-Boyfriend 's Name Everywhere right to tell you youre too young make... Dothats over the top you raise kids who lack self-sufficiency and grow up expecting their partners do!, your boyfriend should stand up for you that is not a romantic relationship but a relationship like that mature... The next time I comment me, love everything about him 's never me... Daughter chooses boyfriend over her family it can really hurt when your daughter prioritizes her boyfriend chooses his 's... Why he chose his daughter over her family you feel insignificant functionality of our platform Follow Xper 4:... Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts, am I asshole. Grown man that their parents used to as the family namecalling, insults, etc will result the... Should stand up for you group theres pretty much some sort of namecalling, insults, etc will result the. 'S just how it is and I thought the best thing for to! Over wife makes his breakfast and lunch everyday and sometimes dinner two going... Let their mothers tell them what they are about my ex was that he still. Said it was a guys night he ended up having to choose between mom and girlfriend chooses over... Boyfriend is essentially choosing his mother over you because hes used to his mom being control! Read and agreed to the emotionally ready for wanted or needed me Letter... Group theres pretty much some sort of namecalling, insults, etc will result the.
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