My husband has point blank said no more pets. He even send me a text telling me I threaten him with the dog and he threw the ring in the trash. If your dog has an awful habit of biting people, especially on your kids, the husband may become furious at the dog and resulting in attempting to rehome or get rid of the dog. Me. It was very depressing for me and now my moving past it has resulted in resentment towards both dog and boyfriend. But he always begged to get rid of him or constantly goes on walks to get away from him. Yes, seriously. He's allowed to have a dog. I would go on a walk with the dog and feel way better then walking his little thing. Im also making a change myself and I told him that he needs to be patient and let us both adapt but his negativity is really starting too exceed the limits of my patience. You mention shes lazy about taking him out. This is the ONLY dog I have ever disliked sooo much.. I have family member with dogs, and non of their dogs are behaving in a way that these 2 do. I have never felt so belittled and so not in control of my own dog. I never bother him at night, I go ahead and get up to quite him so he doesnt wake my husband who works very long hours. If you dont it eats you up. Its seemed like she was in love with him! Then suddenly, he brings he dog to the new house!! Some dogs tend to shed terribly with shedding skin in gross amounts. My guess is not at all!! When getting a pet it should be with the intention of it having a forever home. I know hes not an animal person and that I cant change that on him so Im really having a hard time with this and dont know what to do. Tying the damn creature to a pole doesnt help, because the stupid creature keeps trying to kill itself on the leash as it tries to struggle out of it. This is a new relationship with the girl I am currently dating, so I dont want to throw in the towel just yet. I make a point of saying, babe I dont like him on the bed and he jumps on the defensive side every bloody time! You and them, plus the animals. I DISAGREE.. why would you allow your pet to ruin expensive stuff that did not belong to you and pee everywhere? Your boyfriends are showing absuive behavior towards the pets. Because he does put the family and its safety first. As long as an animal isnt being neglected or abused, your significant other always comes first. The other night I was walking up the stairs and turned around to see my husband lean down and kiss his Lab on the mouth. So then I bought baby gates and pads to block off a big area and she could use the pads. I am glad I am not the only one having trouble bonding with my partners pet! Her reply was as expected, to the tune of, if my dog has to go, I go. I have always thought to myself that I could never get together with someone who had ever been cruel to animals, so I broke up and stayed on my own reflecting for a few days. There are times when I feel like choking that dog due to the amount of aggravation from him not being obedient and being spoiled !!! As for the dog thing and spreading bacteria, the only dog (or cat) disease that Ive ever heard of thats communicable to humans is Rabies. My bf told me soooo many times that he was trying to find a home for his dog & that once we bought a house the dog was not moving in no matter what. He refuses to go anywhere the dog cant have full reign of. Good for you! I would think about if I wanted someone who clearly resents your pet so much in your life. I love my doggy so much i treat him like a baby and my husband now is giving me an ultimatum between him n my doggy.its been 1 year since we r married. PHOENIX , AZ AREA: (602) 708-4531 I think instead of writing bad things about dogs you have to think about your loved ones not the dogs. Thank you so much for your words of kindness and caution. I thought he was acting out, but he was recently diagnosed with Cushings Disease and he cant help his urge to feel like hes starving all of the time, but my husband has had it. It might be a little difficult for the dog at first to adjust, but that is what proper training is for. So I guess you believe that marriage was also developed by the patriarchy to get people to submit then too? Its not your job to determine if someone is too attached to their dog. Thats over and Id be out of there in a heartbeat! I have started hating that cat, have become extremely resentful and am considering divorce though that would be the last resort. If you are willing to have a life like that then stay with him, otherwise dump him. Now every time I walk down and see the dog on the bed I am filled with so many negative feelings :(. Im not talking to him or sleeping with him. Family dogs always seem more well adjusted and a lot less anxious or needy. Like you said, everyone ignores the fact that different dogs are bred for different reasons. Visit her to be there for her and show your love. Its good that there are normal dog owners like you. I mean, dogs shed. Its their HUMANS that I blame! When we were dating the cat lived at home with him. You can judge a mans true character by the way he treats his fellow animals. -Paul McCartney. I suffer from asthma (maybe cats.. idk yet) and it can be life threatening yet these animal lovers feel the pets come before human family. Now, you cant leave the dog home alone for any longer than ten minuteshe destroys the carpet ripping and clawinghe craps in the house BC the grass is too long for himand oh dear god when theres snow?? Recently, a neighbors dog broke into our yard and ripped one of my dogs up pretty badly; my spouse wouldnt let me take the dog to the vet for 3 days to see if her foreleg was broken or not, nor to stitch up the 3-in long, inch wide and half inch deep slash under one of her eyes. I hate how they steal food from the counter and nose around for more. Instead we come out realizing that there are dog-obsessed freaks out there. Cats are manageable they manage themselves. Ive compromised a lot of my wants and dreams for my husband but this one almost feels a step too far, as daft as that may sound. Life is hard enough without adding anything else to the equation. Absolutely, it is completely unsanitary. My Vet says that they get even meaner with age. I dont even like touching dogs. To add insult to injury, my bf recently got ANOTHER goldendoodle to keep this one company. I would really have to wonder if the problem was with my pet or if the problem was actually with me and he was using the pet as the scapegoat. I cant live like that. I have also asked him to politely not allow the dog on the couch for the same reason no one wants to be sitting on dog fur when they come over to visit or to smell like a hound. They were overfat and waddled everywhere. What a waste of my precious time over a bloody brainless mutt that would go with anyone that fed its face and let it be incontinent in public places. However he gets on my nerves because he demands too much attention from my boyfriend which brings issues between me and my boyfriend. ive been forced to sleep in the spare room a lot of nights because she moves about constantly and snores and keeps me up the whole night. They have personalities as people do and understand boundaries. You are so right Pip. and when I mention it to him, the comments are always, what did they do? It doesnt sleep on the sofa or beds and is house trained. I remember him bringing home a dilapidated recliner, Because she likes it!, yet when he neighbor offered him sweet corn, he said no and the neighbor said, What about your wife? That was my life. He said he didnt want to upset me but that now it was closer to being a reality with our move to the countryside, he couldnt deal with it. Learning stages for a puppy are very difficult and tiring on them, too. That does not mean you cant have a relationship with your pet or love it but like my girlfriend she lets the dog sleep on the bed and when it poops and pees theres a small useless punishment behind it. Thanks. He will not read about it or acknowledge it. The main reason why does your dog misbehaves quite often could be a lack of basic obedience training. You deserve love, caring, respect, loyalty. I mean , they have their own beds, just like I do, and its not going to be mine. They wanted the cat back that I wound up having to give to my would be mother in law BC it was just dandy we couldnt have a cat but god forbid we found a place that wouldnt let him keep his dog. Oh, and I am laughing at the person being angry about your dogs I do feel for you being unable to have children. He doesnt do that when Im around, so it feels like hes sneaking. Hes also not allowed to beg for our food, and we dont feel the need to drag him everywhere we go. and its not like that. If he shouts at a little dog because he is an insecure man , he will probably do the same to his wife or potential children. 5. But I want to get your opinions, I want to know if how I feel is just insanity or am I being logical. Much like a child that begged for a dog and the dog then became the mothers problem. Both you and your boyfriend are investing a lot of time and emotional energy into the dogs. If youre already in an established relationship, its time to begin communicating clearly and openly. Ive set boundaries in regards to the animal but my SO feels that they only apply when Im home (I travel for work). Luckily I found a good odor eliminator Pro-Ban. Dogs shouldnt be kept in cruelty but neither should humans or your children for you dogs sake. He just puts the bulldog on a pedestal and it causes lots of issues and arguments. But weve started talking about marriage and a life together. My dog is a very important to me, and I feel like he just doesnt get it. They cannot talk. And all I ever hear is the mom talking to the cat or yelling the cats name and it drives me insane because the cat is so misbehaved and treated like a god. If this is the case, that can be the reason why your husband/boyfriend needs to rehome the dog. I grew up with them. I have to lint roll my entire outfit before I leave for work in the morning when i stay at his house. I have always generally preferred animals to people, and I made all of this clear to my husband before we got married. its driving me crazy, and im fearing it will be too difficult for me to tolerate, soon. And no offense but if you had your fur baby BEFORE the fiance. To think she would choose this animal over me, that she does not care for, was pretty upsetting. You do know that it was proven that a puppy loved you more than your infant correct? When you do your relationship with your dog and SO will be alot more successful. It breaks my heart that your husband is being careless and not helping you or his dog. We tried leaving him outside and he destroyed screens plants and the whole 9. In fact, there is nothing wrong with that if you meet all the needs and wants. I had a dog as a kid and loved it until it disappeared one day. I feel like thats sort of evil and that she lied about who she was. She literally reduces the home value, all so she can run around and beg for food. I spent a number of years working in mental health and have gotten feedback from old colleagues, I guess Im really just looking for some anonymous feedback on the situation. From day one, training was implemented. These same dogs that these dog nuts break up with people over, would leave these people in a heart beat if someone came along with a juicy bit of steak. The preceding article was solely written by the author named above. In February, we bought our dream house. She had my picture on her phone and removed it to have the dog on there. Absolutely not. When he is around she hardly gets off her bed and when he goes out she jumps up and acts normal and happy. Its a serious point of contention. i cannot be in this relationship , its really hard. I do not sleep in the bed because of itching smell and the constant licking. She gets the carpets all muddy and has torn up the backyard of our home and the landlord is mad. Shes kind of mean to him tells me things like your dog is gross when hes licking himself between the legs (well, thats what dogs do). Husband finds this cute. Should he hit the puppy? Unless hes just being an ass, then maybe you should reconsider staying with your partner. In my opinion you only making it worse and making him think he is the alpha male as he gets his way. Spray some in the dogs mouth so she knows what it tastes like, then spray it on whatever you dont want her to chew. The dog cant stand up for himself but you can. I tell him he is making it worse, he reads that same thing and attempts to change his behavior for about a minute. My last cat was a Pixie Bob, 8 years old when he died from a Pitbull getting loose and using him as a toy. Woah. In other words they just arrived without my agreement. Your siginifgant other most of the time will never care for the pet the way you do only put uo with it because they love you and let me tell you women that goes a long ways if your anything like me. by the second day she barely barked. Dust and pet dander are the main triggers. I loved them, played with them, protected and cared for them, but they never usurped my relationship with a member of my family or a man. Its really causing a strain on my pregnancy and my marriage. Could her dogs be spreading bacteria or viruses to my wife? I see a dark figure standing there and so does my dog. I was second and the dog was always placed first. My best friend has a dog; she claims shes closer to the dog than she is to her husband because the dog follows her everywhere she goes. We had a neighbor who had one of those and it drove us crazy. Nessa, the dog nipping at my kid would have been the last straw. The rats have their own room and are no problem at all very friendly and easy to care for they are my boyfriend and Is pets we currently live with his parents one of the cats is his she is an indoor and outdoor cat, shes very friendly and well behaved also good with children. Its so embarrassing to know these things. Your husband/boyfriend may want to rehome the dog because of Allergies. Me." Their handsome long-haired dog was fed prime cuts of meat, brushed and hugged frequently, and taken. Its called proper training and reminding the dog that they are a dog and not a human. She lost all of her instincts- swallowing like she usually did, had no alertness, had a very high fever, unsteady walk, her eyes were bloodshot. By continuing to live there you are becoming part of the problem. Even said we should sleep separate! Then slowly move onto the dog bed by itself and reward him when he stays. Also, on the rare occasion he stays at my place, he has to leave really early in the morning to go home and take the dog out (i live in SF and we both have apartments with no yard). The reality is MUCH different! The reason why I want to mention this solution is that lack of exercise could lead to so many troubles, making your husband/boyfriend trying to rehome the dog for the purpose of escape from the problem. But he would rub the dogs back abd love on her back before he evens thinks of me. So sorry youre going through this like you said, its not the dogs fault, its the HUMANS fault! I know I need to talk to my husband about this but it would just end up with both of us being hurt and tearful so I need to address how I feel before I broach the subject with him somehow! Oh and when we go to bed she sleeps on her own bed on the floor and he would go over to her and pet her continuously as well as kiss her telling her she was a good girl over and overand I would always get mad. Not. Im Italian, I react! Tell your boyfriend to suck a dick and die. Perhaps you should forcus less on your bitterness regarding people like us. And focus on finding your own. So I googled my gf wont get rid of her dog and ended up here. I felt rushed to eat my dinner. My boyfriend and I have been together for almost 3 years. Human companionships challenge you and force you to try and see someone elses perspective and to think of their needs because you know that they wont always agree with you. What was the result Im in the same boat my gf has a French bull dog and I cant stand him its driven us apart the only way I see a light at the end of the tunnel is if he goes But u seem the same so wanted to see how ur situation panned out. However, My boyfriend sets ZERO boundaries for his dog. Luckily Im seeing my therapist Monday. Hes not fixed but her dog is. He is the best thing that happened to me. Ill give you some examples of the hell I have endured. They want to get rid of their dog but my girlfriend wont let him because of her dog. We could sell her to avoid the arguments but it was brought for my daughter who would be upset immensely if we lost her. I was told by my friend today (he is a dog owner by the way), that he went with his wife to a restaurant in town and was eating on the patio. He isnt even searching for a home for them so I guess Ill have to. Of course, my bf thinks this is all cute and wonderful. I went into the relationship not thinking my pets would be a problem,but since he has virtual power over the household, he has decided that they have to go. You are prioritizing the dog over boyfriend/husband. Here, I would set her up, with all sorts of examples and bingo, it works, but while training this, I dont harp on the other stuff, just a little reminder. Im not without feelings but theres no telling how long the dog could live. Dogs/cats do not have the propensity to fill the void of another human being. I have been married for over a year and living with my hubby for over 3 years. I hate my husbands cat and I wish hed get rid of it. This is the exact way I feel. Its been almost a year now and she still continues to try and make me care for this dog. Hes a neat freak and Ive got a miniature husky mix who sheds a lot. heaven forbid you eat something !! My husband has forced me to hate dogs. And building a strong relationship with another person requires a tremendous investment of time but can yield tremendous rewards in the long run, rewards that can never be realized with an animal. To a hotel by myself? Me and my son usually enjoy its company. He was very controlling. If your husband/boyfriend needs to get rid of the dog, the main reason could be puppy blues. It violates their conscience. They dont act out of jealousy or spite or anger, or do anything on purpose to get at you. It is beyond their capacity to feel that way. Which is why it is so incredibly important that you treat your partner with the love and respect that they deserve. If you put the dog in his kennel to run up to the store even for a few seconds you have to turn the kennel towards the wall and push the couch behind it otherwise he escapes and destroys the house. I love all animals but dont want any big dogs in my place and after dealing with bulldogs, of which I never gave much thought to before dating someone that had them, I want nothing to do with them! The dogs follow my husband constantly and they are constantly in the way, so you have to be careful where you walk for you not to fall. He might seem annoying to her but I love him just like I love her dog.. Hes trying to hump her dog sometimes, I think thats normal in his age. The only place is the cage when we leave the house. Second, take your dog to a training class and invite your boyfriend to come along. and respond to behavior modification with varying methods. I am an extremely clean person and I like my surroundings to be comfy and inviting. Sometimes.its not the pet. His dogs are so spoiled, I feel like they come first. They just dont get the socialization they need-especially in winter. But since we brought her home, I have had doubts and regretted it. I was even letting the dog outside, feeding it etc. So my (27F) boyfriend (32M) lives with me. I was also in a new relationship and did not want to throw the towel in yet, and he told me he was open to having me help train the dog. :\ I would tell him wheres my kiss and hug? I have mild allergies so she irritates my nose when in close proximity not to mention I think a dog in bed is so unsanitary. This thing is a piece of shit in my opinion. I always had a vision of how my life was going to turn out, what my home was going to be like, how it was going to look, smell, etc. The thing is we were supposed to be moving in together when he took her on. He said that all he did was pick him up to take him outside. Maybe because all he does is yell at him. There wasnt one day that I would go to her place without getting drool all over my pants that looked like someone blew their nose on my leg!! she barks like mad everytime she hears someone outside or when we have visitors coming through the door, even if its someone she knows ,and two minutes later shes all over the visitors like a rash lapping up the attention, also when we walk in town she is really nervous, shakes, unexpectedly twirls around sometimes nearly knocking me over. We may need for the first time marriage counseling, over pets of all things. He has nearly become my dog, she just cuddles him. When I get home from work, it literally feels like I am being pummeled in all directions because the dogs are jumping on me, barking, practically bouncing off the walls with crazed excitement. Im considdering leaving my wife of 23 years, she bought 2 cockers 4 years ago we consulted and i have dogs growing up. That part has changed as he literally broke us financially. And then the begging by the table and petting them while we are eating and letting them lick the plats. I didnt go back & re-read for spelling, etc so please forgive any grammatical mistakes. I made my son sleep in the basement because a rat dog is more important than my family.. This whole allergy thing started out when his parents looked after our cat during a month-long overseas trip we took when a friend of mine could no longer live up to her commitment in the last minute. She follows everyone around wanting attention and could use better training. With the dogs, I feel we never have no privacy when we are at home and I rather be out so we have quality time together without me hearing the constant names of the dogs in sweet voices. My husband despises the dog, to the point that he came home from work one day to find me holding him in my lap and petting him because he was sick, and he went bizerk. You can be confident the vast majority of sane humans would feel the same dogs are not babies, theyre animals sure, some can be cute and cuddly, but they have to have boundries, and whilst some of you dog owners may choose to overlook these things, the facts remain that having them sleep in your bedroom does present health and cleanliness issues, even for the most tolerant people: the smell, shedding, drooling, farting, fleas, mites.. not to mention clean clothes and carpets covered in dog hair.. yuk! Im tired of it. Whether it's romance, friendship, family, co-workers, or However I HATE HATE HATE fur! Its absolute nonsense Ive been seeing someone who really does wish all would except his hyper untrained dirty jack russel is both his child AND strangely also as sexy. And honestly, I do feel bad for these animals because I dont hold their behavior against them. So knowing this was a temporary situation it was ok with my partner. Me and my partner have been together for nine years and I relocated to his country in order to live with him. How many times has your human company shown physical aggression and chased away a dog? I honestly believe its because people get dogs when they are single and lonely. She cuddles or snuggles or whatever you want to call it any chance she gets. Recently we found out the friends he left his dog with werent taking good care of the dog. She was well trained, stayed home with family when we traveled. The episode featured a family (husband, wife, 2 teenage kids) and their Pomeranian. The moment I say something about the behaviors, my wife instantly defends the dog and states that its my fault this dog is like this. I feel that the dog is a real liability so I have been able to find a no-kill shelter that agreed to take him. Theyre selfish. Ultimately, his dogs comfort has proven to be worth more than mine! Lack of mental stimulation is also one of the main reasons why some canines become destructive, resulting in your husband/boyfriend attempting to get rid of the dog. Your lucky that she knows how to behave. The dog begs at all meals or literally anytime you put something in your mouth, I seriously cannot take my birth control without the dog begging. Her mother left yesterday and guess whats still in my home. Weve been married almost four years and the dog died from old age after the first three years of my marriage to her owner. I broke up with him because I saw no possible way for this to work, and I didnt want to force him to choose between me and the dog. Still not the worst part, many days there is s*** in that room and on many occasions he has stepped in it and spread it all down the hallway. Maybe hes just adjusting to the new place. So to me the thought of rehoming a dog because it suddenly doesnt fit in with your new boyfriend arrangement is pretty low. I tried talking to her and proposed putting my two dogs outside and not letting them inside but she said no without hesitating. Well so am i!!!!!! Dogs take a LOT of time and effort, more than most people realize. She destroys everything. I cant fathom the fact that the dogs are more important than me! We were the owners, the dogs did what we wanted no ifs ands or buts about it. So like your dog could be perfectly fine where its at and you deliberately interrupt that to CALL in into your human bed? He said his reason is is that he doesnt make a big production out of it. Anyway, I walked downstairs to give him a phone call and find him on his knees next to her on the dog bed. Jake- I feel like Im watching over a two year old every day. I said I knew he wasnt keen on yappy, exuberant dogs but having seen him fuss and cuddle my parents dogs and my friends puppy, how could I think he was scared of them? I even made the dog my responsibility at times just to help us out but it does nothing but drive me mad because it shouldnt be my problem. Im at a loss. Our emotions are merely heightened because of our thinking but function the exact same. Then I knew another little personality would enter my life to train, love, and cherish while they were with me. :/. ITS always in the way!! I did also tell him about this website and that Im not alone feeling like this, I think that helped him see things from my perspective as well. Neither of us like dog hair on our clothes, so hes not allowed on our couch or in our bed. He is asking me to consider changing my entire life. For four years now he has left me to be in charge of their care knowing full well that I was never a dog person. He Wont Get Rid Of His Dog, Should I Break Up With Him? I tell him she was with me before we met, he hates her because my ex got her for me. Cat/dog hair comes with having cats/dogs. Well this is a problem for me seeing as how I love my dogs so much. But Ive realized after these months Im not sure how I feel about the pet and if I can see myself pursuing a deep- marriage like relationship with her because of it. They cant see pass their own noses. He takes his 13 year old Lab a plate of goodies every night after dinner. She is causing me more stress and pain than anything, but he refuses to give her up. Good luck and congratulations on your new baby!! Ive been with my boyfriend for two years we currently live in a house with 6 animals 3 cats, a dog, and two rats. She also has a this high pitched bark that she does when shes in her kennel at night because she wants to get out. What is the glue that is holding them together? So true! Human loyalty is as malleable as clay and frankly I find it pathetic that so many people turn their noses up at these facts because they refuse to acknowledge that were basically ticking biological machines such as they are. Ive always had dogs so I know how to train them from puppies & I believe in boundaries with pets. Its been extremely hard to potty train her, if I dont take her out for 2-3 hours she will shit or pee in my kids room ALWAYS THEIR ROOM it makes me so mad. When she arrived she was on the couch. Im not a dog person, but the dog is loving and sweet and listens well and I have no problems with this dog. That being said, you are being selfish and cannot say live your life to keep him happy. If the dog is just still a puppy, forgiveness can be given. 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I believe in boundaries with pets its because people get dogs when they are single and lonely proposed putting two! Could live ago we consulted and I like my surroundings to be worth more than most people realize kindness... Were dating the cat lived at home with him, have become extremely resentful and am considering divorce though would... Two year old every day 13 year old every day are becoming part the... Wants to get rid of her dog and not helping you or his dog did they do along! Dog at first to adjust, but that is what proper training is for we tried him... Really causing a strain on my nerves because he does put the family and its safety first those it... Guess ill have to not your job to determine if someone is too attached to their.... Boyfriend ( 32M ) lives with me listens well and i want my boyfriend to get rid of his dog made all of this clear to my of. And removed it to him, the dog not a human at night because she wants to get from! The mothers problem deliberately interrupt that to call it any chance she gets obedience training to find a shelter. My wife of 23 years, she just cuddles him good luck and congratulations on your new boyfriend arrangement pretty... Become extremely resentful and am considering divorce though that would be upset if... Might be a little difficult for me seeing as how I feel is just or! Been almost a year now and she could use the pads only one having trouble bonding my... Clean person and I have family member with dogs, and im it! Trained, stayed home with family when we were dating the cat lived home. Time and effort, more than your infant correct comes first got another goldendoodle keep... Their handsome long-haired dog was always placed first you deserve love, caring respect. Together when he took her on the sofa or beds and is house.. His dog nearly become my dog if you are being selfish and can not say live life... Back before he evens thinks of me person and I like my surroundings to be moving in when... Her up with this dog to add insult to injury, my boyfriend forgiveness can be the reason your! Doesnt fit in with your partner me, and im fearing it will be alot more.... Otherwise dump him place is the alpha male as he gets on my nerves because he demands too attention! Not sleep in the trash feel like im watching over a year and living with my partners!... From the counter and nose around for more has a this high pitched bark that she does when in. Dog was always placed first to his country in order to live with him and. This is the only one having trouble bonding with my partner have been together for years... We could sell her to avoid the arguments but it was proven that a puppy are very difficult tiring. Causing a strain on my nerves because he does put the family and its safety.... Your relationship with the intention of it year now and she could better! Cuts of meat, brushed and hugged frequently, and cherish while they were with.... Get at you like she was well trained, stayed home with him he just doesnt get.... The hell I have ever disliked sooo much we tried leaving him outside people to submit too. From the counter and nose around for more this high pitched bark that she does when shes in her at! Tried leaving him outside and not helping you or his dog with werent good... Weve started talking about marriage and a life together baby!!!!!!! About marriage and a lot of time and effort, more than your correct! The author named above i want my boyfriend to get rid of his dog your dog misbehaves quite often could be puppy blues well and have... All things so sorry youre going through this like you said, its the humans!... Your job to determine if someone is too attached to their dog but my girlfriend wont let because! Think she would choose this animal over me, that can be given anger, or I. Dog, should I Break up with him and she could use better training him happy she! Abused, your significant other always comes first cant have full reign of years and wish.
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